unReal Vampires

© 2002 Sarah Smiles
All rights reserved.

I am not of logic and reason.
But a being of undecidedness.
Between life and death. Life in death.
Between human and machine/animal.
Between friend and enemy... l'Etranger.
That which cannot be re-ordered.
The margin, the anterior, the error.

I cannot exist understood.
Or stand the light of inspection.
Or replicate social norms.
Not commodity,
I am fetish incarnate:
terminal other eternal.
No choice. All else...
an educational video, and help file.

This a not game. A fiction.
An affectation or an effect.
How you denigrate the tragedies
of marginalization with a PTA meeting,
and a 60 Minutes Special. Sell me not to the bidder
with the highest moral ground or advertising revenues.

Give me back what I have lost:
my civility, my beauty and my innocence.
Give me back my family, my normalcy, and my ignorance.
Give me back my lost and sense less inflated self importance.
Give me back to my myself.

But under no circumstances
turn me into a talk show, side show,
mocking gimmick for gawking
things that I once was.

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